張明權(quán)? |
參考譯文:
60% Chinese riches keen on immigration for a change
Traditionally, an average Chinese holds the idea that poverty gives rise to the desire for change. The poor are keen on change while the rich content with things as they are. However, in today’s China riches are altering the status quo in a manner peculiar to them. In 2011, the number of Chinese people each with more than RMB 10 million worth of assets scales up to 590,000, among whom 60% polled have completed or are considering investment immigration. Furthermore, more than 74% polled of Chinese entrepreneurs each with more than RMB 100 million worth of investable assets follow suit.
Immigration has become the order of the day for Chinese millionaires in recent years. This tidal wave of Chinese immigrants has never been frustrated by the ever more stringent limitations imposed on it by related countries. Even if Canada, for example, gave all its immigration quotas to Chinese, still it would take 13 and a half years to "clear off" arrears of application from Beijing and Hong Kong alone.
參與本譯題翻譯較好的網(wǎng)友有:sumingyu, voiceofsilence, rain_046等,翻譯是一件苦差事,有些網(wǎng)友的翻譯在部分用詞和句式上也很出彩,但在其他一些地方卻存在部分低級(jí)錯(cuò)誤,如果從考試和翻譯實(shí)踐的角度來(lái)看,就很吃虧。這個(gè)問(wèn)題我在前面的點(diǎn)評(píng)中也多次提到,我們這里再次指出幾個(gè)基礎(chǔ)語(yǔ)法與詞匯方面的問(wèn)題:
1) 錯(cuò)誤:among 60% of whom will has been applied for
正確:among whom 60% have applied for
2) 錯(cuò)誤:The poor is the major power to make change
正確:The poor are the leading force to make change
3) 錯(cuò)誤:It is estimated that the rich with 10 million yuan will increase to 590,000 in China
正確:It is estimated that the number of rich people each with 10 million Yuan will increase to 590,000 in China
漢譯英常常需要注意的問(wèn)題是,受中國(guó)人思維模式的影響,漢語(yǔ)的表述往往不遵守形式邏輯,一些表述(看似)前后矛盾,中國(guó)人習(xí)慣上可以理解,但英語(yǔ)讀者未必也一樣能夠理解,這不是低估英語(yǔ)讀者的智商,而是表達(dá)習(xí)慣的問(wèn)題。在信息處理上,漢英語(yǔ)言存在顯/隱方面的差異,因此在漢譯英時(shí)正確處理漢語(yǔ)的語(yǔ)境隱含信息十分重要。
本文中存在前后矛盾的信息,比如上文說(shuō)“6成富人考慮移民”,下文是“60%的富人已經(jīng)完成或正在考慮投資移民”;這兩處比例是相同的,但所包含的人不同,這就是漢語(yǔ)表達(dá)不夠精確的地方,在翻譯時(shí)譯者需要做變通處理,所以我把標(biāo)題譯成60% Chinese riches keen on immigration for a change,而不是簡(jiǎn)單的plan to migrate for a change。漢語(yǔ)中的隱含信息經(jīng)常需要明確譯出來(lái),比如“增至59萬(wàn)人,其中60%的富人”,漢語(yǔ)沒(méi)有交代清楚(可能在上文有交代,這里沒(méi)有)是接受調(diào)查的一部分人,而不是全體的59萬(wàn)人,如果翻譯不交代清楚,很容易產(chǎn)生樣本比例代替總體比例的錯(cuò)誤。
至于詞匯翻譯,“求變心切”用keen on…for a change可以體現(xiàn)出來(lái),有網(wǎng)友翻譯成seeking for quick changes,不是很地道,再者漢語(yǔ)標(biāo)題中的兩部分內(nèi)容往往構(gòu)成互文文本,在翻譯時(shí)應(yīng)根據(jù)英語(yǔ)標(biāo)題的習(xí)慣,采取整合翻譯,因?yàn)橛⒄Z(yǔ)很少用這種松散、意合的句式。“窮則思變”是成語(yǔ),可以吸收前人(詞典)的翻譯:Poverty gives rise to the desire for change,也可以自己創(chuàng)造性翻譯,比如poverty leads to reforms,但翻譯成poverty leads to prosperity不是很妥當(dāng)?!俺娠L(fēng)”,詞典翻譯成:become the common practice,become the order of the day,基本上是可以直接用的,或者簡(jiǎn)單一些:immigration has enthralled the Chinese millionaires。“移民潮”和“清空存貨”都涉及隱喻,前者比較簡(jiǎn)單,因?yàn)閕mmigration wave也是英語(yǔ)中通用的表達(dá)方式,第二個(gè)比喻中的意象是否要保留,可以根據(jù)自己的喜好選擇決定,webweb翻譯成empty the stock of applicants就意圖保留原文的意象,但有把申請(qǐng)人比喻成存貨的感覺(jué),applicants如果換成application就會(huì)好一些。
參考譯文:
"Less money" makes a better child
The reporter randomly interviewed parents on the high-consumption mentality of their children. Zhang Jun who has a daughter dismissed the question as meaningless. He said his daughter is freshman in high school and a dress of hers costs RMB 2,700. He added that as long as his family can afford the consumption, there is nothing so "high".
Liu Bing holds a different view. He said, "If you have more money, you give more of it to your child; if you don't, okay, you give less. However, moderate consumption will benefit your child. Children should be taught to spend less money, to save some if possible, and this will help them form a good habit of moderate consumption in the future."
這里的標(biāo)題看起來(lái)很簡(jiǎn)單,但翻譯起來(lái)卻有點(diǎn)難。所謂的“窮養(yǎng)”,是中國(guó)人撫養(yǎng)孩子的觀(guān)念,中國(guó)文化強(qiáng)調(diào)“養(yǎng)兒防老”,父母養(yǎng)育子女,子女贍養(yǎng)父母,然而在英美國(guó)家,父母養(yǎng)育子女是一種義務(wù),子女卻不需要贍養(yǎng)父母,因此在養(yǎng)育孩子的觀(guān)念上有所不同,比較強(qiáng)調(diào)孩子的獨(dú)立性,即使家里很有錢(qián),也鼓勵(lì)孩子自己賺取零花錢(qián),這也影響到翻譯時(shí)對(duì)一些詞匯的選擇,我們把英語(yǔ)中表示“撫養(yǎng)、養(yǎng)育”的一些詞找出來(lái),比如raising, upbringing, nursing等,加上“窮”這個(gè)詞的英譯“poor”,都很難準(zhǔn)確地表達(dá)出漢語(yǔ)“窮養(yǎng)”的意思。zhouzihang的翻譯是:Raising child in (an) appropriate frugal way matters,比較準(zhǔn)確,但不夠簡(jiǎn)潔。
這一譯題翻譯的第二個(gè)問(wèn)題是如何試圖模仿家長(zhǎng)說(shuō)話(huà)的語(yǔ)氣,我在做參考譯文時(shí)注意了這方面的問(wèn)題,但可能還不夠好,比如:There is nothing so "high". If you have more money, you give more of it to your child; if you don't, okay, you give less. 等處都盡量做到用詞簡(jiǎn)單,以便符合口頭接受采訪(fǎng)時(shí)的說(shuō)話(huà)方式。
(本次點(diǎn)評(píng)的參考譯文中的RMB都沒(méi)有折算成美元,一方面我有點(diǎn)懶,另一方面因?yàn)楝F(xiàn)在差不多輪到美元折算成人民幣的時(shí)代了吧。)
參考譯文:
Dare we the employees dine out?
When we were young, we had three meals at home. We even went home after school for lunch prepared by our parents who would never miss to do so, for we had nowhere to dine but at home. As we grew up, we went dining in restaurants more frequently, forgetting completely about the festal atmosphere related to an occasional eatout. Dining-out has now been the daily routine of an employee. Restaurants bring delicacies as well as convenience, and not infrequently qualms about food safety. Seriously disturbed by "problem" foods cooked in a restaurant, we really wish to have our meals at home again like we did in our childhood.
百度百科對(duì)上班族的解釋是:regular 9-to-5’er 指的是受雇于企業(yè)的受薪階級(jí)人士,也泛指出社會(huì)工作并尚未退休的在職工作者。較狹義的認(rèn)定則是指穿西裝、套裝,在辦公室內(nèi)工作的中產(chǎn)人士,此方面也稱(chēng)為白領(lǐng)階級(jí);廣義則可以指在大都會(huì)里任何進(jìn)行通勤的在職人士,例如教師、文員或甚至是勞工都可以是上班族。
從上述解釋可以看出,漢語(yǔ)“上班族”至少對(duì)應(yīng)著英語(yǔ)中這樣幾個(gè)單詞:
1)工薪族(regular 9-to-5’er或 salaried man;
2)employees, in-service staff;
3) white collars;
4) commuters(including teachers, office workers, clerks, and even laborers).
這里沒(méi)有明確的界定,所以可以采取最廣泛的定義來(lái)翻譯,也就是employees。
至于“下館子”,是相對(duì)于“在家吃飯”而言的,通常翻譯成dine out,名詞形式是dineout?,F(xiàn)在食品安全問(wèn)題很讓人擔(dān)心,對(duì)于上班族而言更加可怕,所以才有標(biāo)題Dare we the employees dine out?有不少網(wǎng)友翻譯標(biāo)題時(shí)用了worried一次,語(yǔ)氣顯得太輕。
這篇文字翻譯起來(lái)整體感覺(jué)不難,不過(guò)還是需要注意一些隱含信息的翻譯,比如“在家吃飯是一種必然”說(shuō)的是改革開(kāi)放之前或之初,餐飲服務(wù)業(yè)不發(fā)達(dá),而且經(jīng)濟(jì)條件不允許,所以只能回家做飯吃。因此也就有了所謂的“過(guò)節(jié)式的享受”,這種享受多了,自然也就不稀罕了,所以這里翻譯需要稍微補(bǔ)充一些信息,以便說(shuō)清楚過(guò)去和現(xiàn)在的感受差異,我加了forget about這樣的說(shuō)法。baiyixia163的理解和翻譯基本上是對(duì)的:Eating in the restaurant is no longer an occasional enjoyment for festivals, but an essential routine for office workers. 但occasional enjoyment for festivals是過(guò)節(jié)的享受,原文說(shuō)的是“節(jié)日式享受”,這里的錯(cuò)誤與對(duì)隱含信息的理解不充分有關(guān)系,在過(guò)去中國(guó)人過(guò)節(jié)是不下館子的,只有現(xiàn)在的人才會(huì)在過(guò)節(jié)的時(shí)候下館子。
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專(zhuān)家簡(jiǎn)介:
張明權(quán),安徽省固鎮(zhèn)縣人,江蘇大學(xué)外國(guó)語(yǔ)學(xué)院副教授,英語(yǔ)語(yǔ)言文學(xué)碩士,上外博士課程班進(jìn)修。主要從事英語(yǔ)語(yǔ)言學(xué)和翻譯學(xué)研究,在國(guó)內(nèi)外學(xué)術(shù)期刊發(fā)表論文10余篇,出版譯著兩部,發(fā)表其他文章20余篇,有大量翻譯實(shí)踐經(jīng)驗(yàn),翻譯總字?jǐn)?shù)接近200萬(wàn)。Email: mqzhang@ujs.edu.cn。
(作者:張明權(quán) 中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)網(wǎng)英語(yǔ)點(diǎn)津 編輯:Julie)