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張明權(quán) |
參考譯文:
More auto buy against the rule assessment
The traffic congestion index in September rises by 10.3% year on year in accordance with the monthly traffic report issued by Beijing Municipal Commission of Transport. The report also points to the exploration scheduled 2013 into measures to keep smooth traffic in Beijing. The research highlights further promotion of flexible and staggered working hours and assessment of the feasibility of carrying out the odd-and-even license plate rule during specific periods and/or within specific areas. If these measures being evaluated are adopted, stricter restrictions will be imposed on vehicles herein as compared with the current regulation based on the last number of a license plate.
小詞大用是一種非常實(shí)際的翻譯策略,以本譯題中的標(biāo)題翻譯為例,介詞against的使用可謂得心應(yīng)手,原本想了很長的一個(gè)題目,后來由于用了against這個(gè)介詞,一下子就凸現(xiàn)了兩個(gè)事件之間的邏輯關(guān)系,把實(shí)行更嚴(yán)格的限行措施與購車增長之間的不期而遇很好地對照起來,很明確地表達(dá)出來,一點(diǎn)也不顯得拖泥帶水。小詞的使用還包括因應(yīng)簡明英語運(yùn)動(dòng),對口語詞匯的使用,本譯題雖涉及交通法規(guī)修訂的法律問題,但仍不妨使用一些口語化的小詞,如rise,point to等詞,當(dāng)然為了平衡語言使用,我在翻譯的時(shí)候也使用了一些大詞,比如in accordance to, highlight, imposed等,這樣配合使用才能體現(xiàn)英語詞匯使用的多樣性。下面選取一篇網(wǎng)友的譯文進(jìn)行點(diǎn)評:
Yesterday, the city's traffic committee published its September Traffic Congestion Report. The congestion index is 10.3% higher compared with the same period of last year. It also said the city will launch the 2013 research of measures for good traffic.The research will focus on promoting flexible work options, work schedules that can help people get around each other's commuting hours, along with the plausibility of an even-odd license plate plan for certain periods of time in a day at certain areas, which,if getting passed by assesment, will be a stricter policy than the existing one.
第一句話中,the city’s traffic committee應(yīng)明確譯為Beijing Municipal Commission of Transport,這是外宣翻譯所要求的。第二句犯了一個(gè)最常見的比較錯(cuò)誤,compared with the same period of last year中的with后面應(yīng)加上that of以使比較的對象相同。第三句research后面的介詞of應(yīng)改為into。第三句很長,其中if getting passed by assessment中的語態(tài)有錯(cuò)誤,可以去掉getting一詞。最后需要指出的是,關(guān)于尾號限行的問題漏譯了。
我們感覺在國內(nèi)的情況是世界原本是有路的,走的人多了也就沒路,在這兒狂堵,但是沒想到還有那么多的中國人去刺激了外需,也就是肥水都流了外人田了。
參考譯文:
Chinese tourists are wooed overseas in the Golden Week
I didn’t expect to see so many Chinese tourists pouring abroad to boost the foreign economy for free, though China boasts the traffic congestion that drives at the parody (on a quote from Lu Xun, a celebrated Chinese writer in the 20th century) that “For actually the earth had many roads to begin with, but when too many men pass one way, a road is blocked”.
Posters in Chinese characters saying “foie gras” and “delicious chocolate” are seen on the wall of a small shop in Paris. What amuses me most is that a staring slogan in Chinese saying that “Diaoyu Island belongs to China!” is hung outside a department store in Venice, Italy to cater to the patriotism of Chinese tourists. This certainly should be listed as a contribution that Chinese tourists have made to the cause of the international publicity of China. Besides stating the fact, the slogan in defiance of the Japanese concern is written conspicuously to attract the Chinese tourists who enjoy an overwhelming superiority to other tourists in population and potential of consumption.
本譯題中的“世界原本是有路的,走的人多了也就沒路”明顯是對魯迅小說《故鄉(xiāng)》最后的一段文字“世界上本沒有路,走的人多了,便成了路”的仿擬(parody)。仿擬是一種非常獨(dú)特的修辭手段,“它有意仿照人們熟知的現(xiàn)成的語言材料,根據(jù)表達(dá)的需要臨時(shí)創(chuàng)造出新的語、句、篇來,以使語言生動(dòng)活潑,或諷刺嘲弄,或幽默詼諧,妙趣盎然。(百度百科)” 例如:
Modern journalism justifies its own existence by the great Darwinian principle of the survival of the vulgarest. ——Oscar Wilde
現(xiàn)代的新聞工作,以“最庸俗者生存”的偉大的達(dá)爾文式的原則來為自己的存在辯護(hù)。
王爾德的名言所提到的the survival of the vulgarest就是對達(dá)爾文生物進(jìn)化論原則the survival of the fittest的仿擬。
那么這里對魯迅名言的仿擬改如何翻譯為好呢?魯迅原句是這樣翻譯的:(It is just like roads across the earth.) For actually the earth had no roads to begin with, but when many men pass one way, a road is made. 那么我們仿一下大概可以說:For actually the earth had many roads to begin with, but when too many men pass one way, a road is blocked. 但問題是英語讀者不可能知道這句話是對魯迅文字的仿擬,所以必須在譯文中加入適當(dāng)?shù)慕忉尅?/p>
再者這段文字整體上采取了幽默的口吻來敘述作者在海外的所見所聞,所以在翻譯時(shí)應(yīng)注意使用此類措辭,請注意參考譯文中boost, boast, contribution等詞所包含的隱含意義。下面選取一段網(wǎng)友的譯文點(diǎn)評:
There is one of the groceries in Pairs, France showing placards in Chinese version, such as “鵝肝醬”(goose liver paste)、“朱古力好吃”(delicious chocolates). And interestingly, as the surging of Chinese visitors, the policy of territorial integrity in China is getting far-reaching around the world. For catching the eyes of Chinese tourists, a bold headline of “釣魚島是中國的!”(Diaoyu Island belongs to China) is showed strikingly outside one of the department stores of Venice, Italy. In fact, the foreign department of such kinds, ignoring of the feeling of Japanese travelers, tended to increase their earnings in similar ways. Therefore, it was demonstrated that the Chinese travelers are comparatively overwhelming in their purchasing and proportion.
第一句中,one of the groceries應(yīng)該改為a grocery, 因?yàn)檫@里并沒有限定一個(gè)范圍;in Chinese version不夠具體,應(yīng)為Chinese characters。第二句as the surging of Chinese visitors中的as明顯應(yīng)改為with。第三句中for catching the eyes應(yīng)改為to catch the eyes,headline是新聞標(biāo)題的意思,掛在店外面的應(yīng)該是橫幅(banner)或口號(slogan); one of the department stores犯了和第一句一樣的錯(cuò)誤。第四句用department代替department store是錯(cuò)誤的,如果有store倒是可以的,因?yàn)楹笳呤巧弦辉~,以屬差代替整詞的情況不是沒有,但一定要遵循語言的使用習(xí)慣。最后一句用被動(dòng)語態(tài),割斷了和上一句的聯(lián)系,應(yīng)改為主動(dòng)語態(tài),all these phenomena showed that…,以銜接上文的事件。
Blissful vexation visits Mo Yan the Nobel Prize winner
Even before winning the Nobel Prize in Literature, Mo Yan, one of the most famous modern writers, had already been ridden by “troubles” of all kinds. Since his name topped the odds list of a lottery firm, rumors spread that he had bribed members of the Nobel Prize Committee, and he had repeatedly been entreated by reporters to voice his opinion about the Nobel Prize. A person to have kept a low profile, Mo Yan went back to his hometown in Shandong to “shun the spotlight”. After he won the Nobel Prize, he began to suffer from the so-called blissful vexation.
When interviewed by Dong Qian from CCTV to answer the question of “Are you happy?”, Mo Yan gave the simple answer of “I don’t know”. To him, happiness consists in clearing everything out of one’s mind, having nothing to care about, keeping a sound health, and shaking off all spiritual burdens. “When I am heavily burdened by my fame, how can I say I am happy? But as one of this year’s Nobel Prize winners, how dare I pretend to say I am not happy at all?”
這段文字中比較難翻譯的是所謂的矛盾修辭法。矛盾修辭法(Oxymoron)用兩種不相調(diào)和,甚至截然相反的詞語來形容一件事物,起到一種強(qiáng)烈的修辭效果,使得所表達(dá)的語義更強(qiáng)烈(百度百科)。網(wǎng)友對文中的“幸福式煩惱”給出的譯文包括:happy problems, the "troubles' as well as "happiness" at the same time, the annoying question of "are you happy?", happy troubles, the dilemma between happy and unhappy, happy style of annoy, the problem of happiness, etc. 根據(jù)矛盾修辭法的一般組合方式,最好采用形容詞修飾名詞的方式來翻譯,比如happy worry,但如果從翻譯學(xué)的角度,采用解釋性也無不可。下面選取一段文字做具體點(diǎn)評:
Mo Yan, a Chinese writer,was overwhelmed by troubles before the 2012 Nobel Literature Prize was conferred on him.Topping the list of the lotter firm in terms of the losing rate, Mo Yan was once rumoured to offer bribe to the Nobel panel of judges and later was inquired by the press of his opinion of the Nobel Prize. As one who keeps a low profile consistently, he went back to his hometown in Shangdong decidedly for a solitude. Having received the Nobel Prize ,he even fell into the grip of the happy troubles.
第一句中的時(shí)態(tài)有點(diǎn)問題,既然是在什么之前,就應(yīng)該用過去完成時(shí)。第二句中l(wèi)osing rate不是賠率的意思,賠率是odds;offer的時(shí)態(tài)應(yīng)該為完成時(shí),否則無法表示莫言被懷疑賄賂發(fā)生的時(shí)間,inquire的句型使用錯(cuò)誤,因?yàn)檫@個(gè)詞所涉及的句型是inquire sth of sb.。第三句中decidedly for a solitude不符合文中“躲清靜”的原意,因?yàn)檫@里強(qiáng)調(diào)的主要是免受打擾,而非獲取清靜本身。
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專家簡介:
張明權(quán),安徽省固鎮(zhèn)縣人,江蘇大學(xué)外國語學(xué)院副教授,英語語言文學(xué)碩士,上外博士課程班進(jìn)修。主要從事英語語言學(xué)和翻譯學(xué)研究,在國內(nèi)外學(xué)術(shù)期刊發(fā)表論文10余篇,出版譯著兩部,發(fā)表其他文章20余篇,有大量翻譯實(shí)踐經(jīng)驗(yàn),翻譯總字?jǐn)?shù)接近200萬。Email: mqzhang@ujs.edu.cn。
(作者:張明權(quán) 中國日報(bào)網(wǎng)英語點(diǎn)津 編輯:Julie)