10. Persuasive proclamations about God. “I feel blessed to be alive on this glorious day, and I owe it all to God. Make God your only Savior and you will never be sad.”
對(duì)神的感人告白:“能活得這么好都是有您的庇佑,我的一切都?xì)w于上帝。若將上帝作為你唯一救星,永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)悲傷?!?/strong>
Analysis: Religious people need to spend more time in church and less time on Facebook.
分析:如果你信宗教就多花點(diǎn)時(shí)間去教堂,花少點(diǎn)時(shí)間在Facebook上。
11. Updates about how much they drink and how excited they are to be drinking: "LOL...it’s only 8:30 and look at us!! We’re already drunk!! LOL!"
喝了多少酒,喝了酒以后多么興奮:“LOL……才8:30看看咱爺們?。攤儍阂呀?jīng)醉啦??!LOL!”
Analysis: “I’m having fun. I swear. I'm not an alcoholic. I just don't know any other way of self-proclaiming my sense of being cool.”
分析:“我挺開心,真的。我不是酒鬼,只是我不知道還有什么別的方法表達(dá)我現(xiàn)在超爽的感覺了?!?/p>
12. Updates of mundane activities written as though they are jokes: “I had to stop and get gas and then wait an hour for a prescription. Then I lost my keys and couldn’t get back in my car. Hahaha.”
憋個(gè)段子寫些稀松平常的事情:“停車加油,又等了一個(gè)小時(shí)拿到處方。結(jié)果發(fā)現(xiàn)我把車鑰匙丟了,現(xiàn)在車也進(jìn)不去。哈哈哈?!?/strong>
Analysis: “It’s funny, right? Please say it’s funny.”
分析:“好笑嘛,嗯?請(qǐng)你告訴我哪好笑?!?/p>
13. Updates written as though the page-bearer never had an English class, not even in elementary school. “OK I went to the OMG the swag thing u know I ran into that girl my friends cousin and she LOL had a gold ring in her nose and she says hey u biggie I swear I almost loosed it right their hahahaha but she knew I had to go to”
好像從沒上過語言課,小學(xué)都沒上過的那種:“OK,我們?nèi)チ耍琌MG,看那個(gè)晃來晃去的東西,跑過去那姑涼我朋友表弟,LOL,她鼻子上長了個(gè)房環(huán),還說嘿大家伙你好啊,我發(fā)誓我快用光了,現(xiàn)在他們的,哈哈哈哈哈,不過她很酷就是了,我得走了?!?/strong>
Analysis: They failed English but finally found a way to express incomprehensible thoughts.
分析:這些人語言不過關(guān),不過也算找到一種表達(dá)他們猜不透的想法的方法。
14. Quoted clichés from various thinkers: “It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” –Unknown.
引用各種哲人的話:“愛過又失去總比從未愛過要好?!薄粗苋?/strong>
Analysis: "I can’t think of anything amazing to say while I comfort myself, and I can’t find my iPod to quote some Lady Gaga."
分析:“我想安慰自己,但我又說不出很牛逼的話,我手頭沒有iPod,Lady Gaga說過的名言我也沒法引用?!?/p>