China's divorce rate has risen sharply in recent years, sounding alarm bells across a nation that attaches great importance to family harmony. Experts have warned that more measures are needed to save increasingly fragile families. If they fail, the consequences could be disastrous. Thirteen million couples were married in 2011, an increase of 4.9 percent from 2010, according to the Ministry of Civil Affairs. However, the year also saw 2.87 million marriages end in divorce, a rise of 7.3 percent from 2010 and equal to more than 5,000 couples divorcing every day. The reasons can seem trivial and sometimes even comical. Shu is working on a case in which a husband has filed for divorce because he and his wife are unable to agree on which set of parents they will stay with during Spring Festival next year. The husband insisted on the divorce after his wife muttered some vague, angry words about his parents. Another seemingly trivial case Shu recalled was that of a businessman who wanted to divorce his wife after she inadvertently broke wind and embarrassed him in front of important business partners during a very formal meeting. "Many cases have been reported where the couple divorced within a year of marriage. In the most extreme cases, couples have registered and divorced on the same day. People are too hasty in getting married and lack a sense of responsibility to both family and society," said Wu Changzhen, a professor who specializes in civil, marital and family law at China University of Political Science and Law. "No nationwide data is available on cases where divorce has resulted in criminal activity, for example when a spurned spouse has arranged for his or her former partner to be beaten or worse. But our research during recent years indicates that the high divorce rate is actually proportionate to a rise in criminal cases. Most murders are the result of extramarital affairs. It's of the utmost importance that we take the necessary measures to intervene and save failing marriages," she said. Chen Yiyun, a marriage researcher at the Chinese Academy of Social Sciences, said: "Many people will laugh when they hear some of the reasons for divorce, but for me it's not funny at all. Society will disintegrate if the family dissolves, and this is a fundamental cause of many social problems. It not only affects the lives, work and families of those who divorce, it also affects their children's upbringing. "The rate of juvenile crime committed by children from single-parent families is three times higher than that of children from integrated families. The rising numbers of extramarital affairs and domestic violence also increasingly threaten social stability and greatly raise the cost of law enforcement." 'Marital medics' "Running a marriage is just like running a business. Couples need to communicate and a 'cold war' is never recommended as a way of solving marital problems. On the contrary, the longer a failing marriage keeps limping along, the greater the likelihood of an irrevocable breakdown," said Chen. "If a person is in poor health, they need to see a doctor, otherwise long-term neglect could eventually lead to a fatal disease. Failing marriages are very similar. When problems arise, the couple needs to see a 'doctor' to diagnose the problem and regain their marital health," she said. |
中國的離婚率近幾年持續(xù)增長,已經(jīng)給我們這個(gè)自古就崇尚家庭和諧家和萬事興的國度敲響了警鐘?;橐鰡栴}和婚姻法等方面的專家認(rèn)為如果不盡早對(duì)婚姻問題進(jìn)行調(diào)節(jié)和干預(yù),由此引發(fā)的一系列社會(huì)問題將對(duì)非常嚴(yán)重,成為導(dǎo)致社會(huì)不穩(wěn)定的主要因素之一。 根據(jù)民政部門統(tǒng)計(jì),2011年依法辦理離婚手續(xù)的有287.4萬對(duì),增長7.3%,粗離婚率為2.13‰,比上年增加0.13個(gè)千分點(diǎn)。相當(dāng)于我國每天有5000多個(gè)家庭解體。 而除了婚外戀這個(gè)主要的婚姻殺手之外,離婚的原因也是多種多樣,很多是因?yàn)榧彝ガ嵤禄蚴且鈿庥檬?。舒心最近處理的一個(gè)案子就是小夫妻因?yàn)檫^年去誰家要離婚。 “現(xiàn)在結(jié)婚一年內(nèi)就離婚的人數(shù)也在增長。甚至有極端的例子當(dāng)天結(jié)當(dāng)天離。人們對(duì)待婚姻的態(tài)度變得越來越盲目,十分不可取,這間接也體現(xiàn)出人們對(duì)于婚姻中自己和雙方家庭責(zé)任的缺乏?!敝袊ù髮W(xué)教授,中國法學(xué)會(huì)婚姻家庭研究會(huì)名譽(yù)會(huì)長巫昌禎教授介紹到。 她說雖然目前她手中沒有權(quán)威的統(tǒng)計(jì)數(shù)據(jù),但是從她的研究中發(fā)現(xiàn)離婚率的上升與刑事案件的上升是成正比的,很多殺人和傷害案件起因都是婚外情。巫教授認(rèn)為進(jìn)行婚姻指導(dǎo)、干預(yù)、提高婚姻質(zhì)量已經(jīng)迫在眉睫,必須予以重視。 “很多人面對(duì)五花八門的離婚原因一笑置之,但是對(duì)于我們來說這其實(shí)是很嚴(yán)重的社會(huì)問題需要解決。家庭是社會(huì)構(gòu)成最小的單位,如果這個(gè)最小的單位瓦解、不穩(wěn)定,且數(shù)量增多,不僅僅是當(dāng)事人自己和雙方家庭,孩子,還會(huì)直接導(dǎo)致很多社會(huì)問題,而這并不是危言聳聽?!敝袊缈圃貉芯繂T、中國婚姻家庭研究會(huì)專家委員會(huì)副主任陳一筠教授說。 陳教授說,這些問題如果任由其發(fā)展而得不到及時(shí)有效、妥善正確的處理解決,其后果不僅會(huì)嚴(yán)重影響個(gè)體的生活質(zhì)量、阻礙事業(yè)成功、導(dǎo)致婚姻家庭的失衡,也將是造成國家經(jīng)濟(jì)發(fā)展滯后、社會(huì)秩序混亂的潛在危機(jī)隱患。 陳教授認(rèn)為夫妻離異對(duì)當(dāng)事者各方都造成不良影響,其中最大的代價(jià)是由孩子承擔(dān)的。生活在單親家庭的孩子往往表現(xiàn)出各種心理與行為問題。孩子的健康成長和學(xué)業(yè)會(huì)受到父母離異的嚴(yán)重影響。有數(shù)據(jù)表明,在有心理疾患的孩子中,60%以上來自不和諧或解體的家庭;單親家庭的青少年發(fā)生違法犯罪的幾率是雙親家庭中同齡人的3倍。除此之外,由此帶來的社會(huì)問題也間接增加了社會(huì)的執(zhí)法成本。 舒心說,其實(shí)婚姻就像人的一生一樣,也會(huì)生病,生病了就要看醫(yī)生,而且越早越好。不然病態(tài)越久最后的結(jié)果就是死亡。所以當(dāng)婚姻發(fā)生問題的時(shí)候,也要找“婚姻醫(yī)生”找出問題所在對(duì)癥下藥才會(huì)保持婚姻的健康。
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