談戀愛,雙方年齡差多少合適?這個理論認(rèn)為…… What’s the best age gap in a relationship?
中國日報雙語新聞 2021-11-27 09:00
“年齡不是問題,身高不是距離?!碑?dāng)愛情發(fā)生時,似乎一切都不是問題。不過,是否存在最佳的年齡差可以讓親密關(guān)系更長久呢?
An often-asserted rule of thumb to determine whether an age difference is socially acceptable holds that a person should never date someone whose age is less than half their own plus seven years.
一種流傳很廣的理論認(rèn)為,社會普遍能接受的年齡差是年紀(jì)小的一方不小于年紀(jì)大的一方年齡的一半加上7。
按照這個公式來看,一個28歲的人和一個小于21歲(28÷2+7=21)的對象談戀愛就不太合適。
盡管來源是個謎,但這個理論已經(jīng)被不少人拿來判斷兩個人的年齡差距是否合適。
男性和女性的選擇有何不同
交友網(wǎng)站OKCupid的聯(lián)合創(chuàng)始人Christian Rudder所做的研究表明:男性和女性在年齡差上的偏好有所不同。
While female users look for men roughly the same age as them (or perhaps a year or two older) men prefer women in their early twenties, regardless of their own age.
女性通常會選擇和自己年齡大致相近或者大一兩歲的對象,而男性無論多少歲都會更傾向于選擇20出頭的對象。
While women prefer a small and constant age gap, men are so hooked on the idea of a nubile young partner that they prefer a larger age gap the older they get.
女性更喜歡小而恒定的年齡差距,而男性非常著迷于年輕性感的伴侶,因此男性年齡越大越傾向于選擇更大的年齡差。
Across Western countries, about 8 percent of all married heterosexual couples can be classified as having a large age gap (ten years or more). These generally involve older men partnered with younger women. About 1 percent of age-gap couples involve an older woman partnered with a younger man.
在西方國家,大約8%的已婚異性夫妻年齡差距都較大(10歲或更大),其中大部分夫婦是年長男性與年輕女性的結(jié)合,1%是年長女性與年輕男性的結(jié)合。
那么,較小的年齡差距會使兩個人在一起的可能性變大嗎?
年齡差越小越好?
小的年齡差似乎有不少優(yōu)點,兩個人之間較多的相同點或許能增強(qiáng)彼此間的情感聯(lián)系。
The ability of both members of a couple to sing a favourite childhood television theme tune could bond them together, at the risk of irritating those nearby.
情侶們冒著打擾身邊人的風(fēng)險,哼唱同一首孩提時期最喜歡的電視劇主題曲,或許能讓二人更親近。
In 2014, the Atlantic claimed that “a five year age difference makes a couple 18 percent more likely to get divorced, compared to a couple born on or around the same year.”
據(jù)Atlantic在2014年的研究,有5歲年齡差的夫妻離婚的可能性比年齡相同或相近的夫妻要大18%。
但是這種判定也不是絕對的,離婚與年齡差不一定就存在著因果關(guān)系。
關(guān)系走向與什么有關(guān)?
雖然不少人認(rèn)為有較大年齡差的兩個人關(guān)系可能不會長久,但也有研究表明伴侶之間年齡差較大意味著更多的信任與承諾。
These couples seem to report greater trust and lower jealousy than similar-age couples. Over three-quarters of couples where younger women are partnered with older men report satisfying romantic relationships.
年齡差較大的情侶會更信任彼此,嫉妒也會少得多。有超過四分之三的年輕女性與年長男性結(jié)合的情侶們對親密關(guān)系很滿意。
If people in age-gap couples believe their family, friends and wider community disapprove of their union, then relationship commitment decreases and the risk of break-up increases.
如果存在年齡差的情侶們認(rèn)為他們的家人或朋友不贊成二人的結(jié)合,那么這段關(guān)系破裂的可能性就會相應(yīng)增大。
Another factor at play may have to do with the stage of life each partner is experiencing. For instance, a ten-year gap between a 20-year-old and a 30-year-old may bring up different challenges and issues than for a ten-year gap where one partner is 53 and the other is 63.
另外一個影響關(guān)系走向的因素是兩個人所處的人生階段。例如,同樣是10歲的年齡差,20歲和30歲之間人生階段的差異自然要比53歲和63歲的大很多。
真愛面前年齡不是問題
當(dāng)然,數(shù)據(jù)只是一個大致趨勢,愛情這種人生的修行還是如人飲水,冷暖自知。
世界上不存在成功愛情的秘訣,一段親密關(guān)系能否快樂而健康最終還是取決于身處其中的當(dāng)事人。
盡管年齡差距可能會為一段關(guān)系中的兩人帶來一些挑戰(zhàn),但只要雙方共同維系這段感情,年齡就不會成為障礙。
We all know that the best things in life don't come without putting in a little work, and love is no exception.
愛情和生活中其他美好的事情一樣,不付出努力是不會來到我們身邊的。
愿大家都能找到自己生命中的“the one”。
編輯:李金昳 商楨
實習(xí)生:向靜雅
來源:維基百科 經(jīng)濟(jì)學(xué)人 The Conversation BRIDES