為什么你說(shuō)話沒(méi)人聽(tīng)?無(wú)非就是犯了這七個(gè)毛?。?/span>
中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)雙語(yǔ)新聞微信 2018-02-04 08:38
說(shuō)話著實(shí)是門技術(shù)活。
有些人說(shuō)話讓人聽(tīng)著總是那么舒服,而自己說(shuō)話的時(shí)候,明明是激情澎湃、肺腑之言,朋友卻經(jīng)常對(duì)其置若罔聞。
這大概就是“會(huì)說(shuō)話”和“不會(huì)說(shuō)話”的區(qū)別了。
今天就一起來(lái)研究一下說(shuō)話的藝術(shù),如何賦予語(yǔ)言力量(how to speak powerfully)并且讓聲音真正成為我們?nèi)祟惇?dú)有的樂(lè)器。
說(shuō)話的“七宗罪”
英國(guó)聲音專家Julian Treasure通過(guò)自己的生活經(jīng)驗(yàn),發(fā)現(xiàn)了在生活中我們常犯的、并且應(yīng)該努力避免(move away from)的7個(gè)說(shuō)話上的錯(cuò)誤,這就是說(shuō)話的七宗罪(seven deadly sins of speaking)。
? Gossip 流言蜚語(yǔ)
Speaking ill of someone who is not present. It's not a nice habit but we know perfectly well, the person gossiping, five minutes later, will be gossiping about us.
在背后說(shuō)別人的壞話不是一個(gè)好習(xí)慣,但是我們十分確定,現(xiàn)在這個(gè)正在八卦的人5分鐘之后就會(huì)將自己的八卦觸角轉(zhuǎn)移到我們身上。
speak ill of:說(shuō)……的壞話
? Judging 評(píng)頭論足
We know people who are like this in conversation and it's very hard to listen to somebody if you know you are being judged and found wanting at the same time.
我們?cè)谡勗捴杏龅竭^(guò)這類人,如果你知道自己此時(shí)此刻正在被審視、評(píng)價(jià),并且還不被看好,就很難聽(tīng)進(jìn)去這個(gè)人的話。
? & ? negativity and complaining 消極與抱怨
It's the national art of the UK. We complain about the weather, sport, about politics, about everything, but actually complaining is viral misery. It's not spreading sunshine and lightness in the world.
抱怨可是英國(guó)的國(guó)民藝術(shù)。我們抱怨一切,包括天氣、運(yùn)動(dòng)、政治等等。但是抱怨真是一種病毒傳染性的痛苦與自憐。它可不是在向世界傳遞陽(yáng)光和光明。
viral:病毒性的
? Excuses借口
We've all met this guy. Maybe we've all been this guy. Some people have a blamethrower. They just pass it to everybody else and don't take the responsibility for their actions, and again, hard to listen to someone who is being like that.
我們也遇到過(guò)這種人,或者我們自己就是這種人。有些人總是喜歡為自己找借口,他們永遠(yuǎn)把責(zé)任推到別人身上。當(dāng)然,這種人的話人們也聽(tīng)不進(jìn)去。
blamethrower: 指責(zé)他人的傾向
? Lying 撒謊與欺騙
For example, if I see something is really awesome, what do I call it? And then, the exaggeration becomes lying to us.
當(dāng)我們看到一件特別令人驚艷的事物時(shí),我們?cè)撊绾涡稳菽??也許,后來(lái)過(guò)度的夸張就成為了謊言。
exaggeration:夸張
? Dogmatism 固執(zhí)己見(jiàn)
The confusion of facts with opinions. When those two things get conflated, you are listening to the wind. You know somebody is bombarding you with their opinions as if they were true. It's difficult to listen to that.
固執(zhí)己見(jiàn)的人混淆了事實(shí)與想法的界線。當(dāng)兩者混到一起的時(shí)候,這樣的話就像耳邊風(fēng),對(duì)于事實(shí)知之甚少。當(dāng)有些人想用自己的想法強(qiáng)加于你時(shí),其實(shí)你很難聽(tīng)進(jìn)去。
conflate: 結(jié)合,合并
bombard sb with sth:向…大量提供信息
上面說(shuō)的這些說(shuō)話的7個(gè)壞習(xí)慣,你中招了沒(méi)?如果中招的話,需要改善了噢。
說(shuō)話的藝術(shù)
Julian之后又闡述了4個(gè)打造powerful speaking的基礎(chǔ)(cornerstone),他將其稱為HAIL原則,當(dāng)然啦,這里不是冰雹的意思,而是四個(gè)單詞首字母的組合。
Being honest means being clear and straightforward.
誠(chéng)實(shí)意味著直率、清楚地表達(dá)出你的想法。
Authenticity means standing in your own truth.
真實(shí)是指不掩飾地表明自己。
Integrity refers to acting what you say.
正直是指說(shuō)到做到,信守諾言。
Love means wishing people well.
而愛(ài)則是指每一句話都是出于為了對(duì)方著想的考慮出發(fā)的。
誠(chéng)實(shí)與愛(ài)的關(guān)系非常有趣。Julian說(shuō):
“Tempered with love, honesty can be a great thing.”
摻入著愛(ài)的誠(chéng)實(shí)是非常棒的事。
聲音品質(zhì)的提升
最后,Julian向大家奉獻(xiàn)了一個(gè)工具箱(A toolbox),可以通過(guò)一下幾個(gè)方面提聲音的品質(zhì)。
Register: a deeper voice from the chest speaks with more power and authority.
音域:從胸腔發(fā)出的更加深沉的聲音顯得更有力量,更具權(quán)威感;
Timbre: how the voices feels or sounds — distinct from tone or loudness.
音色:聲音的質(zhì)感,不同于語(yǔ)氣和音量大??;
Prosody: the sing-song or up and down of the movement.
韻律:說(shuō)話時(shí)如歌唱般,音調(diào)上下起伏;
Pace: a rapid pace, then slowing down for emphasis. Or just pausing occasionally can be powerful.
語(yǔ)速:語(yǔ)速要偏快,但在重點(diǎn)的地方放慢速度或偶爾的停頓會(huì)使語(yǔ)言具有力量;
Pitch: a higher pitch can make you sound more excited.
音調(diào):更高的音調(diào)會(huì)讓你聽(tīng)起來(lái)更有激情;
Volume: quiet to make people pay attention, louder can also show excitement.
音量:小的音量讓人們專心,大的音量則可彰顯激情。正如Julian Treasure所說(shuō):
No engine works well without being warmed up.
沒(méi)經(jīng)過(guò)預(yù)熱的發(fā)動(dòng)機(jī)無(wú)法好好工作。
而我們的話語(yǔ)也是如此,沒(méi)有經(jīng)過(guò)預(yù)熱、訓(xùn)練和力量的聲音也難以傳達(dá)出預(yù)期的效果。
最后,Julian提出了自己關(guān)于說(shuō)話者,聽(tīng)話者與環(huán)境之間的美好構(gòu)想。
他希望可以通過(guò)說(shuō)話人有意識(shí)地避開(kāi)不良的說(shuō)話習(xí)慣,賦予語(yǔ)言力量;聽(tīng)話人有意識(shí)地傾聽(tīng)以及促進(jìn)交談的環(huán)境的建構(gòu),創(chuàng)造一個(gè)美麗的溝通世界。在那里,理解將會(huì)是常態(tài)(Understanding will be the norm)。
希望你可以有所收獲,掌握說(shuō)話的技巧。俗語(yǔ)說(shuō):
良藥苦口利于病,忠言逆耳利于行。
It takes bitter medicine to cure a disease properly; it takes blunt advice to put us on the right track.
但是誰(shuí)說(shuō)忠言就一定逆耳呢,避開(kāi)7個(gè)錯(cuò)誤,整理好4種情感,培養(yǎng)自己的聲音品質(zhì),就一定會(huì)使自己的聲音充滿力量卻又不失溫暖。
(來(lái)源:中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)雙語(yǔ)新聞微信 編輯:李雪晴 實(shí)習(xí)生:李美萱)