Over the top?
中國日?qǐng)?bào)網(wǎng) 2015-06-23 10:12
O'Connor's next project after the phoneline, Doubtfire Dads, is a fundraiser and tribute to Williams – and "hopefully a witty and slightly more agreeable type of event that won't upset anybody".
His own first family life fell apart when he gave up the activism of his youth and, while marketing and designing restaurants, became what he calls a "fully paid-up hedonist". It wasn't long before the drinking became a problem and once or twice he thought of killing himself. "Climbing bridges came from my experience of depression – I thought rather than jumping off them, let's be aspirational," he says.
On one occasion, he lost it inside the family court and got drunk afterwards. "I did laugh when you said to meet here because it was on Waterloo Bridge. It's a hazy recollection, I'm afraid. I'd had most of a bottle of Jack Daniels – my spiritual adviser at the time and not a brilliant one. It basically came down to two lists, of negatives and positives, and the only two positives were my kids so I thought I've got to try and find some light in what seemed an absolutely hopeless situation. I'd lost my family, my house, my business partner had died in a fall from a balcony, two companies had gone under, but thankfully a mate bailed me out and gave me his camper van and I found somewhere to stay."
Reading through the transcript of our interview I stopped counting the number of times I disagreed with O'Connor. He is glib about the effects on children of residency being passed from parent to parent as courts dish out penalties for flouted orders, and says moving homes or schools is no big deal. Meanwhile, he uses the most extreme language to talk about adult experiences, at one point comparing separation from children to the death penalty. He appears to ignore the views of charities and professionals about the importance of privacy in family law.
But O'Connor is right that some men become very vulnerable following family breakdown, and right to point to suicide, along with homelessness, as problems that affect men disproportionately. He answers honestly when asked how divorce affected his first two sons – that he doesn't know.
It must be hard to go straight when silly stunts get so much attention. In his other life as an icecream entrepreneur, O'Connor was behind the breast milk-flavoured ice cream that made headlines a few years ago. But his strongest point is simple: "If mum doesn't send little Johnny to school, she will go to jail. If mum doesn't send little Johnny to see dad, nothing happens. There's no sanction."
- Fathers4Justice founder Matt O'Connor: 'I thought I could change the world in three years', TheGuardian.com, June 20, 2015.
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About the author:
Zhang Xin is Trainer at chinadaily.com.cn. He has been with China Daily since 1988, when he graduated from Beijing Foreign Studies University. Write him at: zhangxin@chinadaily.com.cn, or raise a question for potential use in a future column.
(作者張欣 中國日?qǐng)?bào)網(wǎng)英語點(diǎn)津 編輯:Zoe)